The first time someone visits you in your new city is a big deal. You’re still getting used to your new city and are probably doing things a little differently than you did back home. You’re still forming your routine and opinions on your new surroundings when all of a sudden it’s time to entertain someone else’s opinions!
“Will they like it here? Will they hate it? Will they think I’m crazy for moving here?”
At the end of the day it doesn’t matter if they like it or not. You decided to move to your new city for your own reasons, but there’s always going to be a small part of you that wants your loved ones to love your new city as much as you do. It’s not necessarily because you crave their approval as much as it’s about them understanding a piece of who you are.
Recently my boyfriend visited me in my new city and I have to admit I was a little apprehensive. I hadn’t been in Portland for that long and was still crystallizing my feelings on my new city. I was getting used to being totally on my own out here and all that entails. Also Carm and I had finally settled in our routine and I was grateful for a bit of regularity after the crazy couple of months of transition we had. But I digress. I got to as good of a place as I could about it, and welcomed the disruption.
I wanted him to see Portland, ME in all of its glory: the grit, the history, the beauty and the varied landscape. I wanted him to see and understand why I decided to call this place home. However, I was prepared for the possibility that he may not love it here as much as I do.
“What if he doesn’t like it? Do I love my city enough to endure any criticism about it?”
Luckily he did love Portland and thoroughly enjoyed all of the places we explored from the Portland Head Light and Acadia National Park to the local eateries and breweries. It was an awesome week and we had a lot of great adventures..and a few near-death experiences—thank you, Cadillac Mountain!
The bottom line is that at some point a loved one is going to visit you in your new city. Will they love it or hate it? Will they demand you come back home or will they want to move out there with you? Will they disrespect it or will they “get” it? Unfortunately there’s no way to know until they actually visit. My advice is to hope for the best, prepare for the worst, and you’ll probably end up somewhere in between.